New Worlds

“Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.”

Anais Nin

My daughter recently posted a picture of herself with two close longtime friends and the joy on each of their radiant faces inspired me to search for quotes about friends. I looked for quite some time before I finally found the one that reflected what I was feeling from this photo…and you just read that quote above.

The power of friends…

Where even are the words?!


I began to contemplate “new worlds” being born…simply because of the presence of a true friend in my life and how deeply grateful I am for each of them for what they taught me about myself…fostering that change for the better within my mind and soul that did indeed bring forth a “new world” in my life.

And so often brought me to do so for others too.

I am feeling very humble right now, just beginning to touch on thoughts of so many amazing people that have appeared in my life…

Some for shorter visits…

Some for extensive stays.

But each presenting some rare jewel that no other could quite have brought.

Today then, is about Friends and New Worlds.

Get ready to sink into just how wonderful your life has been.


Just for a moment, gift yourself with a Pause to bring to mind someone in your life who caused you to find a “new world” within yourself.

How did they do this?

It could be a tiny world…

Or a giant world…

Or any size in between.

Perhaps they laughed with you.

Or cried with you.

Shared a beautiful picture with you.

Told you “You can do this! I can SEE it!!”

Maybe they dove down into darkness with you with the sole purpose of bringing you back to the surface.

Perhaps they were silent, able to hear more deeply beneath what you were saying or doing than you were able to…then from that, helping yourself to hear and see more clearly.

Maybe they allowed you to sit and voice an opinion very contradictory to their own… without making you feel you had to conform or be anyone else but you.

Or they may even have spoken the words you were afraid to voice…but yet, in your hearing them pronounced, you were finally freed from some internal struggle that had been holding you back for so long.

They might have brought you food when you were so upset you had forgotten to eat.

There may have been a time they opened a door in your mind to a new way of seeing or interacting with your world…not so much giving you an answer but instead lighting a way to your discovering a new solution.

Were you ever gifted with a friend who…

showed you a future vision of yourself you never would have conceived of…

But because they did, you struck out on a path to see who this different “you” truly was…

And found that your friend knew you better than you knew yourself?

Because of such a friend…

You became More You.

Tears are in my eyes as I am overwhelmed by all these treasures I have received…



More than I can hold.



Think of just one person who has opened a New World for you.

Think of what they did or said.

How they did or said it.

How you felt then…

And now.

If they are no longer here in this realm, speak gratefully to them in your heart…as you sift through the memory of their imprint on your life.

If you have lost touch with them, go within yourself to name what they did…and then send them appreciation for their part in the changes they helped you to make.

If you are fortunate enough to have a way to reach out…

With a call

A text

A handwritten note

A visit…

To tell them of even just one tiny shining corner of what they brought to your life…

Share that with them.

Do it.

And soon.

In that moment of gratitude in that memory, you are not only reliving the New World they brought to you…

You are also gifting them with a New World as well, simply with the expression of joy you are bringing into their life.


A New World will always create yet another New World…

But we cannot see how truly miraculous and infinitely numerous they are…until we take a few moments to rest in remembrance…

For it is there we find we are ALL renewed once again.


To a New World.

Radix Amoris (The Root of Love)

“Love is the most radically subversive activism of all, the only thing that ever changed anyone.”

Ann Voscamp

Voscamp takes a very forceful voice with her language here, so I thought we might have a little “etymology adventure” with three of her words.

First, we have “radically” which comes from “radix”, Latin for “root”.

Then the word “subversive” (that which undermines an established system)…stemming from two more Latin roots.

“Sub”: beneath

“Vertere”: to turn

Then finally “activism”

From Latin again

“Actus”: “event”, or “a thing done”

(And here, I am moved to Pause just a moment to express deepest gratitude to my father who taught me as a child to love words and their sources. He, and his love for words, lives on in my own learning, reading and writing to this day! Gratias ad te, Pater meus…amo te.)

Back to class now!

So with Voscamp’s quote we’re being pushed strongly to look at the roots, the underside…

Where it may be a bit darker

And harder to get to things…

Those roots we don’t see

Often don’t acknowledge

But that nevertheless “feed” what is growing and reflected above ground for each of us.


Now wait! Don’t back away quite yet…

We’re just going to dig just a little more, to keep us going.


Even though “subversive” is often used with a negative connotation, we can Pause to change even that outlook, by asking:

“How could Love be a positive subversive force today…for me?”

Will I use it to undermine some “established system” stuck within myself?

Would I begin to dig around and loosen some resentment that comes from not receiving something I think I have a “right” to have?

Or shall I exhume some anger grown from a past wrong another has done?

Do I begin to extricate a belief that something “must be” exactly as I see it and can’t be changed?

And how about the “activism” of Love?

Well, that’s self-explanatory, because action implies movement


The possibility of change.

And yes, you know I am compelled to mention Responsibility here, because the only changes that we are in control of are those in our own hands.

If I see Love as something that constantly moves and shifts,

If I see Love as a choice I make in every moment?

The “turning beneath” unearthing part is not so sinister as at first glance…

Because it means I not only have the power to move;

I am also in charge of choosing to be WILLING to move.

To turn away (even a little)

From something that is keeping me locked down….


Where I, if I am being truthful, really don’t want to remain growing.

Love has the power to do that.

And the source is


In the moment.

That’s where we will start every time.


Love stops and notices and embraces ALL that comes along.

It is no High Judge.

It only receives

And is grateful for ALL.

Love lives IN the Pause.

By standing still

And strong

In its infinite peace…

It pulls ALL into its arms.

It says,

“You belong.

This belongs.

Everything you see




Whatever you can experience?


I can


Hold it all.”

Love changes everything

And everyone.

From beneath.


Radix amoris.


Pause today to notice how many of your senses can be involved in gratitude…

In acceptance of the present moment and what it is offering you.

Then notice what changes:

Within you?

And then beyond you?

Did your clenched stomach relax or your mental churning slow down just a bit?

Did the redness of a flower deepen and glow more intensely…or the clouds orchestrate a fabulous array of shapes just for you?

Did you notice the soft silkiness of your dog’s fur as you slowly stroked her head…and did you see an angel looking at you through her warm amber eyes?

Love is something we give…

And because of its profound quality of infinite reciprocity,

It is also something we are constantly receiving.

No matter what our current trials may be?

We will always find sources of gratitude right there before our eyes…

Patiently Waiting….

For us to Pause

And dig a little…

To find yet another Radix Amoris.

That shift?

The “unstuckness” we seek?

Is just a thought away.


Today, each time you reach out with Gratitude…

Watch how your Love becomes





And then ultimately…

Wondrously magnified.

Hummingbird Moments

Susan Chernak McElroy shares here an unforgettable experience…

What we can learn from broken Humming birds…

Many years ago I was working for the Marin Humane Society when someone brought a young adult hummingbird that had been caught by a cat. The tiny bird rested in a tissue-lined jewelry box that had never held anything as precious, brilliant, or dazzling as the cargo it held then.

I lifted the bird into my hand and felt a wave of nausea wash over me at the sight of her injured wing. Broken into jagged pieces, it hung from the bird’s shoulder like a crushed flower petal. There could be no rescue for this hummingbird. I held her sadly on my open palm and could not have been more surprised when the tiny bird dusted herself off like a chicken after a bath, teetered up the hillside of my hand, and came to perch confidently on my index finger. She began a thorough preening that included the remains of her useless wing, unmindful of my startled face a mere four inches away.

I walked carefully to the employee kitchen with the bird on my finger and mixed her up a quick sugar drink, I don’t imagine she had ever seen an eyedropper before, but she eagerly reached her sliverlike beak to the dropper and drained it in an instant.

“When I put my face closer to marvel at her, she met my gaze, eye for eye. Hers was the size of a grain of translucent black sand. Mine was blue and as large as her body. Her boldness astonished me. How could something this small, with potentially everything in the world to fear, be so courageous? I had handled probably hundreds of wild animals in distress and seen none as calm and trusting as this braveheart hummingbird. On some level she must have proclaimed me ‘safe.’ And that was that.

She did not seek me out in her crisis, but neither did she run from me. We faced each other across the catastrophe of her brokenness and came together for a too-brief few moments of gentle, sacred exchange. I had few heroes in my life at that time, but she instantly became one of them. That I could not offer her life and recovery was devastating to me. Perhaps that is why I still carry her jeweled green face and starlike eyes with me a full twenty-five years across time.”



Close your eyes and let this story sink a little deeper

Into your mind

Your heart

Your soul.

What comes up for you?


Now read it a second time.


What was new?

What did you experience differently that shifted your first view?

And what changed within you?



What happens

When we Pause

To look


We gift ourselves.

And so we cannot help but gift our world as well.

Such giving is always interconnected…

And always brings a change.


McElroy’s words are riveting for me: I was totally drawn into the story…

And so very grateful she took the time to pen her words!

Captivating and poignant… 
The meeting of two beings with open hearts 




All this creating a soul-wrenching beauty

A love/awe experience between two creatures expressed simply in complete presence…

No words needed.

In such moments of connection:

Miracles are revealed 
Wisdom shared 
And strength exchanged 

In just that one single moment.


Every Pause is a gift.

And always… 

We EACH have 

SO very much

To give.

The moment I cease my thoughts, my actions

Simply to notice what is being offered to me?

That is truly a moment of creation.


We create…

In remembering to ask myself:

“What Hummingbird Moment will you find hidden today…

Within this Pause?”

Truly all

Becomes new

Before my eyes.


Will you go now…

And begin your creative journey?



Look again.


Hummingbirds everywhere!

(Photo credit: The picture of the quite “unbroken” hummingbird above was taken by my dear friend Kara Salvagno in her very own backyard. My very deepest gratitude to you, Kara, for sharing your beautiful friend with me…and with all who come to alight here amongst these words!)

Our True Garden

“When in doubt, choose change.”

Lily Leung

“Same doesn’t allow for growth.”

Tamara Lechner


If I notice myself

On one side

Fearing to speak up

Or to act



On the other side

My inner voice says

“Do it!

Be different!

Choose change!!”

Then I am in that moment facing full on

A miraculous opportunity

To shift…

To become




In this moment of Pause

I am being presented


With the chance

To bloom….

But I realize anew

With wonder and joy

Something even more


I am assured

To my very core

That I am not just a single flower…

Oh no, I’m not.

I am an entire




Take a moment to close your eyes.

Take a few deep, relaxing breaths.

What Conflict is most present for you right now?

Hold it in your mind and heart.

Easy now.


If judgment tries to take control, ask it to step aside…

Just for a few minutes.

(We often have to do this more than once! Know that this is normal. Just keep asking Judgement to step aside again.

It will.)


Observe both sides of the Conflict.

First, see yourself choosing to stay the same.

How does your body react?

Your mind?

And now your feelings?

Now switch.

Imagine yourself choosing a different course of thought and action in dealing with this Conflict.

How does your body react?

Your mind?

And now your feelings?

Which choice brings you…







Which vision

Makes you feel most vibrant

And real?

THAT is your True Garden.



Love yourself enough

To go walk among your beautiful flowers.

As Lily Leung pleads with us:

“Choose change.”


Change is so often difficult

Because we haven’t experienced this exact circumstance before.

But if we DON’T change

Just think…

We would still then be living

As we were.

Do we really want that?

(Tell yourself the truth.)

If your inner voice is saying,


Aren’t we all just a little bit curious

To explore…

What THAT Garden really looks like?



DO go walk there.

And know this also:

That there will be other eyes

Watching as you go…

Gaining just enough strength

To Pause.

And wonder.

To believe finally in their own Garden

Waiting…just there, over the rise.

Empowered at last

To take a first step

Down their very own path.

And we’re we able to fly above it all?

We would discover

That ALL our Gardens

Are connected

In a miraculous astounding rainbow blanket

Of never ending color…

As far as the soul can see.

A “Re-Minder”

Some beautiful musings from Courtney A. Walsh…

“Dear Human:

You’ve got it all wrong. You didn’t come here to master unconditional love. That is where you came from and where you’ll return. You came here to learn personal love. Universal love. Messy love. Sweaty love. Crazy love. Broken love. Whole love. . . You didn’t come here to be perfect. You already are. You came here to be gorgeously human. Flawed and fabulous. And then to rise again into remembering. But unconditional love? Stop telling that story. Love in truth, doesn’t need ANY other adjectives. It doesn’t require modifiers. It doesn’t require the condition of perfection. It only asks that you show up. And do your best. That you stay present and feel fully. That you shine and fly and laugh and cry and hurt and heal and fall and get back up and play and work and live and die as YOU. It’s enough. It’s plenty.”


This passage is so timely…

So encouraging…

And so necessary…

As we all need to be reminded…

To be “Re-Minded”.

To choose a moment or two

To take the next step

In learning the practice of shifting perspective.

To discover yet one more jewel

Shining just there…

In the Crown that is our Soul.

To uncover more of

Who We Are…


To relearn the Truth that this is all that is ever needed or required

Of any of us.

Underneath it all?

We ARE Love.

Each moment we choose to be completely present

With only our simple love exposed…

Each moment we arrive

With no other expectations

Or judgments…

Each moment we leave behind the “attachments” that hide and smother

The Love that we are…

Then we are reflecting the Wholeness of Who We Are.

We are including ALL the components that reside within us…

No exclusions.


There was no separation ever intended to exist between

“Us and them”…

“Me and you”…

She and he”.

This has always been of our own making along the paths of our lives…

These divides…

Some handed to us by another,

Some formed of our own fears and doubts.

Many whose roots are deep and as yet unknown.


To keep our balance?

To keep our hearts steady?

Our minds clear and our souls free of projections?

To return to the fullness of living

For which we were always intended?

It is crucial for us to Pause…

To “Re-Mind”’ourselves

Over and over


We are created in Love

By Love

For Love

To BE Love.

To be “Re-Minded” Now…

And then at the very next Now…

And then again, at the next Now.

Everything we need?

Was already “installed” within us at the beginning.

So if we can just sit still a few moments

And allow this realization to bubble softly to the surface,

We will not only know our own power

And love ourselves

For all that we contain;

We will also begin to remove the dark shades from our eyes,

The shadows on our spirit,

The masks over our feelings…

Enabled again to see the same Love

Living within each of our fellow beings.


I am thankful for Walsh’s passage

Her “Re-minder”…

Nudging me to make yet another Shift in my outlook.

To help me see the miracles…

Ever present.

All around.

I am truly grateful to have been

“Re-Minded” today…

Yet again.

Outside-In Thinking

“He who seeks for applause only from without has all his happiness in another’s keeping.”

Oliver Goldsmith

If I am giving my power away to another person or circumstance,

Allowing the result I desire

To be out of my own control…

Then I am not truly living my own life.

I am not Whole.

What happens if I Pause to filter my day today…

With noticing

Any instance I wish for outward confirmation, support, encouragement, acknowledgement…

And then, with that awareness, immediately choose to turn within

Asking my heart instead

To show me

How it actually holds…

The very thing I was seeking all along?


It’s in there, what I need.

I know it is.

But I’m not in the habit of remembering to look there consistently.

I am often too strongly drawn

To the “outside”

For my wellbeing.

Now why would that be?

Am I believing that “anything has to be better than what I might offer?”

Am I saying to myself,

“There’s no way I could be capable, strong enough, competent or fully prepared…to handle what’s going on?”

Yes, we do need to know when to ask for help…

At times we may need support, counseling, physical assistance.

But if I’m being truly honest with myself?

There are many instances when I could choose to trust myself to come up with the words or deeds or thoughts that I need in that moment in order to express care for myself.

In doing so, I move towards independence.

And am therefore no longer a pawn or victim of circumstances or someone else’s responses or expectations.

I know, down deep, all the confirmation…

All the strength…

Any resource I need…

Is ALWAYS within me.

Every bit of it.

And each one of us knows this as well.


Because we have either FOUND it in there…

Or we have at least sensed it.

A soft tiny feathered bird…

With eagle’s wings…

Waiting to leave the cage of doubts, fears

And hardened beliefs

That hold it captive.

Why is our bird there

In the dark

Unable yet to leave?

We are often simply afraid…

Of our own miraculous power…

And what would then be required of us.

Yes, there would be more required…

BUT there would always be more available within us

To fuel it…

To balance it.

There would never be lack.

There would always be enough…

To balance.

Because we will be going WITHIN

For our strength..

Our energy…

Our love…

Our peace…?





So all our assumed outside needs

Are rendered




We can use each time we find ourselves seeking outside…

As catalysts

To remind us to turn and look within instead…

To discover a new way to release our bird

With the eagle’s wings.

And we only need practice this

One instance at a time

(Not all at once)

Until we learn to forget…

There was any other way to seek…

Or any other place to look❤️

Nurturing The Artists We Are

“If we become addicted to the external, our interiority will haunt us. We will become hungry with a hunger no image, person or deed can still. To be wholesome, we must remain truthful to our vulnerable complexity. In order to keep our balance, we need to hold the interior and exterior, visible and invisible, known and unknown, temporal and eternal, ancient and new, together. No one else can undertake this task for you. You are the one and only threshold of an inner world. This wholesomeness is holiness. To be holy is to be natural, to befriend the worlds that come to balance in you. Behind the facade of image and distraction, each person is a artist in this primal and inescapable sense. Each one of us is doomed and privileged to be an inner artist who carries and shapes a unique world.”

John O’Donohue, in Anam Cara


Oh my…

These words…

The thoughts and images they invoke for me…

Are beyond incredible.

As I read them, I long to stay immersed in them

Until I absorb all that they are saying

About each one of us…

Our beauty

Our power

Our potential

Our purpose…

Take just a few moments to wade into just a single one of these phrases…

Whichever one tugs at your mind

Your heart

Your soul.


You WILL be changed…

So get ready.

Where are they pleading for you to walk with them?

Where in your world do they ask you to take them?

Now…reach for the soft hand they offer you…

And find a way to walk…

Looking around intently

To see where they may want to rest next.

A kind word.

A smile.

Throwing away some trash left behind by another.

Forgiving some word or deed from your past…

Speak, if you feel called.

Yet do so with gentleness for all concerned.

Act…if you dare…

For some courage

Some vulnerability will be required of you.

Look around.

And you will suddenly find yourself emerging slowly but surely from your previous protective cocoon.

And you may finally be able to notice behind you…

Your miraculous wings.


How do O’Donohue’s words affect you today?

Do you, like me, find yourself loving yourself, your uniqueness, your value…just a little bit more?

Are you somehow then deeply drawn to repeat this acknowledgement…

This acceptance

Of yourself

Of all beings

Of all that surrounds us in nature?

Repeating this experience again…

And again?

Do you discover, perhaps underneath it all, a shining piece of yourself

Seeking to be seen?

And along with it, a soul longing to share that…

Ray of light that is You…

Somewhere in your piece of the world

As soon as you can?

What happens when you do?

Loving The One (Sequel to “Finding The One”!)

“When does one know one truly accepts n love [sic] ourselves as we are? Self love? When do we know we come to that stage?”

Shashi, in Mysuru, India

(Shashi posed this question to me after reading “Finding The One”)**

I was so intrigued with digging further into this query, that I decided to create this sequel post that same day using the answer I gave to Shashi, plus a few additional thoughts.

Some interesting timing to mention…

I posted “Finding The One” on Sunday.

I answered Shashi’s query on Monday…and also completed most of “Loving The One” on Monday.

Then this quote appeared in my inbox this morning (Tuesday) as I was wrapping up this blog to send out!

“Falling in love is a small awakening, and the further we follow our Imagination, the more we fall in love with all things.”

Martha Beck

Interesting how everything works, yes?

So away we go…


Hello Shashi,

I am truly grateful for your question, the time you took to acknowledge it within you and the curiosity that encouraged you to ask it. I am hoping that many others may add their insights here to respond to your query, but for now, I will humbly offer my perspective frim my own experience.

The process of learning to truly love who I am has been one of slowly uncovering layers of accumulated beliefs about myself…rather like peeling an onion little by little. It is more recently an ongoing practice for me, as I am coming around to being more consistently aware of, and thus better understanding, my “internal talk” about myself…and how it affects my views and interactions.

Whether I approve or disapprove…

Whether I am content or agitated…

Whether I am grasping or pushing away…

The beginning of self love always involves a simple noticing when self-judgement (“good” or “bad”) occurs, at any time at all. Having a regular practice of meditation has been one important key in helping strengthen this habit of “noticing.”

Observation of my inner reactions to past and present thoughts, actions and feelings…

Reflections on what I COULD then think, do and feel…

This “art of loving myself” is what I am now trying to make more and more consistent. With patience and practice, Who I Am and how to love ALL of me, is slowly being revealed.

So COULD we ever “arrive” at perfect self love?

My feeling (again said here with great humility from a beginner’s mind) is that it seems at first glance to be an ongoing growth of noticing, accepting…noticing, accepting…with NO judgement allowed.

And oh yes, it’s often not easy to leave judgement out of the picture…it hovers constantly!

The key, though, lies in the Present, the “moment by moment” pieces of our lives that we ALL possess: we can all do anything we wish IF we look at the moments one by one…the single steps we must take.

I remind myself perfection is not needed…only just a simple pause to “see myself” in any moment… to discover the beliefs behind my “seeing”…and to decide, from that “mental step away”, how I would like to proceed with any future actions.

Pausing to observe – to take a literal or figurative breath – gives me the time and spacing to observe, away from the action. As a result, I find my decisions begin to have less “harmful” results.

When I choose to love Me in that very Now moment, I suddenly realize I could only ever BE as I am in THAT moment…

How could I be otherwise?

It is exactly where I have landed…

As a result of past circumstances…

And so I AM only exactly where I CAN be.

There is only ever this Me Now, to face and to love.

For this I can choose to be grateful…

As gratitude IS love and acceptance of everything about ANY moment I choose to notice.

There is only ever this Me Now to face and to love.

For this I can choose to forgive (myself, others)…

As forgiveness is the act of freeing myself from past weights, events, pain…

And is therefore an act of love as well.


The only way I could be different NOW is for something to have been altered beforehand.

And it wasn’t.

I cannot be any more or less than I am right Now…so this is the only point in time where I CAN accept and therefore love ME.

This is where I practice.


The Me I see


Is the only Me available

To love

In this single moment.

(Note how this holds true for how we see others as well).

Since the past has passed, Now is all I have…

And its power is infinite, should I choose to Pause and consider even ONE of the possibilities available for my next thought, act or feeling.

That would then create

The Next Me

For me to love.

How would I wish this Me to think, act and feel?


This is how we grow our love for ourselves…

Little by little

Moment by moment.

What if I don’t like what I am seeing?

If I struggle to love the Me I see, I could bravely say instead,

“I am willing to CONSIDER loving You.”

This at least allows a door to remain open for exploration…

I am promising myself:

“I will not shut you out.”

(See here also how we can transfer this concept to others as well?!)

Then, in the next moment, I am already changed.

Because I shifted…

I am no longer exactly the previous Me.

So then I choose again to love (or consider loving) that Present Me as well.


In keeping a repeated moment by moment love of Self going, a continuous chain of awareness is forged….helping me begin to peel back again the how and why of my thoughts, actions or feelings. And this helps me to be able to change and grow in all areas, if I am willing.

With all that said, there is one more thing emerging as I write this:

Yes, practicing self-love does appear at first to be an ongoing process….

So it would seem we never would truly ever “arrive” at fully loving ourselves, right?

In a sense, we would never feel complete…we would never finish…

Always in process

Never done.

How frustrating!

But consider this:

If we do not love ourself NOW, when could we ever do so?

This moment by moment practice of awareness…like a “river” hidden beneath…is helping us to to become adept at continuously loving ourselves.

And therefore this moment by moment flow of single “drops” of love means we ARE “arriving” at self love with every moment!

Since each moment of self-love IS its own “arrival”…

We are actually always complete…

Even as we move along.

Quite the oxymoron:

Arrival = Moving On.

Moving on = Arrival.

Our moment by moment “arriving” enables us to love ourselves continuously….

And completely…

And then to carry this practice outwardly into our world.

Our “river” seems to be a whole never-ending entity…

Until we realize it is simultaneously made of many single drops as well 💧 💦 🌊



When do we come to the stage of truly and completely loving ourselves?

It happens

In every moment

We choose to say to ourselves

“I love you now…”


“…just as you are.”


“I love you now too.”


“And Now as well.”







Many best wishes for your continuing exploration and discovery, Shashi. Your question has helped me so much on my journey as well…and I am grateful for your presence here. Thank you so much for “stopping by” to Pause at this post!

Finding The “One”

“Be weird. Be random. Be who you are. Because you never know who would love the person you hide.”

C. S. Lewis

If we decide, just for today, to turn to a new belief that there is the possibility of finding just ONE person “who would love the person [we] hide”, I imagine we would become…

So curious

So hopeful

So excited

So energized…

That we would run right out to start looking for this “one” that could somehow love everything about us…

who would even love the quirky parts, the damaged parts, the shameful parts…all the parts of us that we seek to shove into the dark corners.

I also am imagining that we might just find ourselves seeking this “one”

Not just today…

But as each new day arrives.

We might find ourselves establishing a habit…

Maybe even an addiction….

Because we so hunger for love

And acceptance

Just as we are in this moment.

But wait just a minute or so.

Before I go running out that door

Looking all around…?

Each time, I will set an intention to Pause, to acknowledge that I MYSELF must be the FIRST ONE to love “the person I hide”.

I promise not to say to myself,

“I love you EVEN THOUGH

You look like this

Act like that

Said this

Thought that.”

No I say,

“I love you as you present yourself now.

Bring all your looks, your acts, your speech, your thoughts.

Just lay them here.

And after we thank them for what we can learn,

We leave them behind…

To start again



And no matter what…I will STILL LOVE YOU.”

For every time I can accept some neglected part of myself…

My world brightens

My power grows

And I can see so much more love out beyond my own heart.

I can see possibilities.

Pausing first “to love the person I hide” is the key…

To finding all that I need.


Look within.

Cherish yourselves first, my friends.

Be deeply grateful for ALL that you are…

Because you ARE that “one”….

The “one” always so near

But yet so close it was hard to see.

Yes, this beautiful “one” must be found within us…


Before any other searching begins,

Hard as that may be at times.

But as we learn to truly see and accept more and more of our “inner one”…?

All else will fall gently into place.

And we will find ourselves transforming into that “one”…who loves all that others hide.

We become the answers…

For each other.

Thriving In Our Solitude

“Almost always the creative dedicated minority has made the world better.”

Martin Luther King

You know those times when you feel so different, and so alone, because you’re not like everyone else?

Because you feel misunderstood?

Put in a box?


Those times we feel our thoughts or feelings are in the minority…especially when we’re still oh so vulnerable and learning how to honor them and show up as ourselves?

In such solitude, our view may have convinced us that it’s okay to rely on a habit of giving up a “piece” of ourselves in order to keep the “peace”?

And then the isolation just increases?


What if

In our very aloneness

Is hidden the power

To make the difference…

Within us?

And then later, “outside” us?

What if


Is the NORM…

And NOT the uncomfortable

Odd place that it might first present to us?

But as we share this stance with so many of our fellow human beings…

We see that the odd minority IS actually the norm because of its very ubiquitousness!

What if

We Pause and shift our view

To see our place instead…



The most freeing

UNLIMITED position

For me to be…

BECAUSE I am in this unique minority all my own?


It’s actually SPECIAL…

Uniquely created for your own special miracle working right where you are.


What happens next?

How would I




Standing right here…

If I believed

I am not really ever alone…


By virtue of where I am positioned

Right now

Just as I am…

That I hold the power

To change the world I am gifted with…?

To give a smile to the cashier who has trouble pulling her own full smile out…

To send a prayer of peace to the gentleman who leans on his car horn when I don’t pull out of my parking space quickly enough for him…

To truly listen with compassion and openness to the friend whose expectations turn out to be different from my own…

To speak up bravely when my own feelings and motives have been pushed away habitually for many years…

These are the exact points in time where our “minority” thoughts and feelings can jump in to sabotage our day, our relationships, our energy…

But their very discomfort, even their pain, is truly a call for gratitude, for these darker shadows awaken us, allowing us to see we have the choice to reject the old pattern…

And choose another.


Every time

If we so desire.

What if I AM brave enough

To select a fresh progressive thought?

One that nurtures the tiny seed of a newfound belief…

One that says “I care about myself…and I can care for another at the same time…Just watch!”

One that says “YES I CAN!” to the action it softly yet firmly asks of me?


How will I respond to

THIS query:

“So NOW what?”

What if I say,

“I choose to trust myself today to THRIVE in my very special uniquely creative ‘minority’…?

I pledge to remain continuously grateful for it throughout my day…

Just as it is?”

What if I believe…

“I am always ready…




When solitude abounds?”